19. “If we don’t talk about it, it is never going to change” – Unknown

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I have been watching “13 Reasons Why” on Netflix for the last few weeks. Or one may call it a bit of binge watching.  It is a series about suicide, sexual abuse, violence, bullying – do I need to go on?  I am sure you get the picture. It is confronting, it is real and it is raw. I came across the quote at the same time “If we don’t talk about it, it is never going to go change” and it resonated. This week I attended a mental health conference on the Gold Coast.  There was a lot about facts and figures but there was also a lot about connection and humanity. It was also about speaking up and creating change. I have had a roller coast kind of week so I spent most of the day yesterday reflecting and processing.

What does connection and humanity really mean?  Sometimes I feel that we have complicated life and we just need to back to the basics. Be kind to one another, have compassion and treat one another with loyalty and respect. It doesn’t mean to say that I am perfect. I know and own that there have been times when I haven’t acted in true integrity. I choose to practice self-love and worth and I work consciously to understand my behaviour towards myself and others.

My blog and writing for me has always been an opportunity to get “stuff” out of my head. It is a way that I am able to explore what is going on for me without having to internalise it. It is my way of taking responsibility. “Stuff” happens to us because we either have to resolve it or it is an opportunity to learn. Sometimes it is a walk to the beach, to witness the beauty of a little girl dancing in the water, living ever so presently with absolute joy and laughter. The world is simply a reflection of where we are at; life has only to offer what we choose to see. The lessons aren’t always easy to learn and sometimes it takes us a while to process.

So if we choose to hide who we are or say what makes our voices quake are we living our truth? Although it has been depicted in a television series, 13 Reasons Why also reveals the real implications of speaking the truth and seeking justice in behaviours that are out of integrity.  The series just as life is provoking. Predominantly it is about a teenager taking her own life. It delves into how the actions of others implicated this in some way shape or form. The decisions that we all make on a day to day basis can create an impact good bad or otherwise.  So be vulnerable, say what it is that you feel and know that we all have the power to create change. As important as our stories may be, equally so is the opportunity to make a difference.  Blessed be and so it is.

 

With a sprinkle of fairy dust and may magic follow your day.

 

HUGE LOVE

 

Sonia xxx

24. Love is the most important thing to give, regardless of the circumstances.

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There seems to be a lot of discussion about the recent elections and new president of America. No, this is not another post or blog about what Trump has said or done. Quite frankly he no longer interests me. Instead I can actually sit and write about what he taught me in such a short amount of time and I am grateful. I refuse to give him any more air time or power. I was in a bakery picking up some chocolate for my dad’s birthday when I heard the news that he had won. I shuddered and tried to extrapolate it from my mind. I was on my way to my dad’s celebration dinner and I didn’t want to let the news dampen how I was feeling.

Later that night as predicted it was all over Facebook and the distaste and disharmony spewed onto my newsfeed. That is except for a few. There was an extremely funny comparison to a dinosaur cartoon that he eerily resembled from the 80’s. Most importantly there were other perspectives on the recent result of the presidency of America. First things first it was about owning the shadow within us. Trump only pushes our buttons because there is a trait that resides inside of us. Feels uncomfortable I know, but if you were to be really honest with yourself I am sure there has been a snippet in time where you may have been racist or ignorant towards somebody or something. I know there have been times in my life where I have had made judgments on others. Not entirely proud of it but our shadows allow us to seek truth and grow.

The other perspective was about stepping up in love. If we are hurling abuse at him are we not just as bad or distasteful as he is? Please let’s make no mistake; I am not a fan of Trump. What I can say is that he is teaching me who I am not. I want to be able to see or hear about him and not feel triggered. Instead I want to create and feel more love and compassion for the world that we live in. There is one thing for sure the world needs a whole lot of love right now.

What if Trump is showing us what it is that we need to be? If we don’t want to be like him, then who do we aspire to be?  What if we aspire to be the best version of ourselves? What if we stopped looking outside of ourselves and know that the answers we seek are already within. To know that there is no guru or leader other than the one that resides inside of who we truly are. What if it is about stepping up in love, compassion and integrity? I know that I have been able to shift my perspective about the election because I don’t want to waste this one precious life feeling insecure about my future. Instead I want to be able to turn it around and follow my bliss. Love is the most important thing to give, regardless of the circumstances. Blessed be and so it is. So it is done. Namaste.

 

With a sprinkle of fairy dust and may magic follow your day.

 

HUGE LOVE

Sonia

xoxoxo

23.Radiate an energy of serenity and peace so that have an uplifting effect on those you come in contact with.

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For me writing this blog is also about challenging myself to create different ways of thinking, feeling and seeing the world. Of course it would be super easy to sit and write about how I am radiating serenity on a good day when I am full of brightness and spark. This would be super simple and fun somewhat. I work in the area of mental health and in the past I have had my own mental health issues to a point of self-deprecation and destruction. It wasn’t fun. I am sure that there were many suggestions throughout this time where professionals would have indicated ways to “feel better” I was too depressed to care or listen.

That is just it.  When we are in such a debilitated state to care, is when the real works needs to happen. I am in no way suggesting that I am able to provide you with expert or medical advice. What I can simply say is what worked and didn’t work for me. What I am passionate about is changing the way we perceive mental health and that it is not just about the person who is supposedly “suffering” but as a community and collective that we all share the responsibility to be of service to humanity and to each other.

Too often I hear and see the “suffering” that occurs in silence. That people are wearing so many masks to present this way or that way. When deep down all they want to do is yell and scream, but still they carry on in their day, week, month and even years pretending that they are OK. Pretending to a point that they are even unaware of what is real and what is a mask. That by the time it has reached this point, radiating energy of serenity is the furthest thing from reality. The fight and struggle to endure what comes next is indicative of freedom and what you then wish to create. Sure you can go on living in a “zombie” state or whatever you want to call it. Wear as many or as little masks as you like but what is most pertinent is the authenticity of the creation.

I don’t sit here and write this from a perspective that I have it all worked out. Far from it, but what I do know is that I have been able to trust and know myself well enough to have a solid understanding of what works and doesn’t for me.  Courage and resilience are often key components and knowing that you deserve and worthy of all that you are and all that you are meant to be.  I would far prefer to sit with someone who is open and honest about their depressed state than fumble my way through a fake conversation of superficialness. #Justsaying# At the very least the depressed state is real! So be whoever you need to be at the time. Radiate an energy of serenity and peace so that you have an uplifting effect on those you come in contact with. Blessed be and so it is, so it is done. Namaste.

With a sprinkle of fairy dust and may magic follow your day.

HUGE LOVE

 

Sonia

xooxxo

 

 

13. When you reach the END of your ROPE tie a KNOT in it and HANG ON – American Proverb.

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The first thing that came to my mind when I read the proverb for today was a saying from the movie Marigold Hotel – “Everything will be alright in the end and if it’s not it’s not the end”. Human spirit and resilience is profound. Finding it is the freedom to recognise the drama and stories that we play out in our lives.  For the last few weeks I have been putting some serious efforts into writing “my story”. A story that has allowed me to find the freedom to be me, ALL of me and not just parts that I thought were OK for the rest of the world to see. The authenticity in allowing ourselves to feel and stand in our truth is one of justice and responsibility. We all have a story, mine isn’t special or rocket science but it is unique to me.

What I found most poignant in the proverb is that the end is only death. Every day and every minute is an opportunity to grow and truly live the life that we were meant to live. I am no acclaimed guru nor do I want to be I am just like you. You see our world is simply a reflection, so when shit is going down it is time to take a deeper look inside and check in to see if the life you are living is where you are meant to be.  It sounds so fricken simple yet we get caught up in the daily grind of shit and expect it to be different. I certainly haven’t got it all worked out and I quite possibly won’t till the day I leave this earth. But what I do know is that each time I learn I shed some more and become more of who I need to be. I can choose to be in my story or I can dig deep, find the lessons and move to the next step of alignment in my life.

I am so grateful for the lessons of resilience for they have given me the strength to understand who I am. Without them I would quite possibly be living a life without integrity and authenticity. Trust me I have known that life and to live in a world where you are trapped by your own limiting beliefs, tortured self-esteem and lack of love is one that is crippling. Every now and then a lesson will pop up, perhaps the planets have aligned or there is a new moon, to be perfectly honest it doesn’t even matter. Rather what I do know is the life that I live is one that I am able to find strength, hope, resilience and love for all that I do. When I am not it is time to check and go deeper to uncover the gifts that deserve to be received. So if there is a point where you have reached the end of the rope, hang on a little tighter, tie the knot and if you can’t tie it for yourself reach out and ask someone to do it for you. It will be the greatest gift for both of you. Blessed be and so it is. So it is done. Namaste.

With a sprinkle of fairy dust and may magic follow your day

HUGE LOVE

Sonia

xx

I trust in the Power that created me to protect me at all times and under all circumstances.

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I could not have believed this more than I do so right now. I have been doing some casual work in Child Protection in the last week. To say the least it is an environment that may not be conducive to most and at times when I have told somebody what I am doing their reply “I could not do that kind of work” Each to their own is my theory and I know for me it is not an area of my life that I could be involved in on a full time basis but for now I am enjoying the experience for what it is. What I do know in this particular scenario with two staff members and a 14yr old child I have had faith and trust that the power that created me will protect me under all circumstances. Week 1 and I have had an amazing week. Sure we can turn our heads and we can pretend that this world doesn’t exist but it’s real and it tugs at my heart strings that such a little person has had so much destruction in their life.

Today I read a Facebook status that was along the lines of “let’s bring back corporal punishment for paedophiles etc” Every person that commented agreed. My response was “Perhaps we should put effort and resources into prevention rather than reacting to the crime” Please don’t think for one minute that I condone any of that behaviour and yes I agree to punishment.  The debate for me is not necessarily about corporal punishment. Instead for me it is about that for most of us as human beings we see the other side. We easily forget that the person that has committed the crime was once a 14 yr. old child, who through not fault of their own has ended up in such circumstances.

I know it is a tough one and for those that have been affected by any such a crime it is not OK and there are no excuses but killing them won’t fix it either. The cycle of troubled and damaged childhoods needs to stop. Love, loyalty and respect for each other need to intensify to perpetual levels so we can feel the grace of goodness upon us. If this doesn’t happen we will only seek revenge instead of compassion and love for human kind.

By all means have your opinion and feel what you have to feel. This is only my perspective so take with it what you will. All I know is that I have witnessed and felt humanity, compassion, love and respect at its best in the last week, from staff that protect and care for a much damaged young person. They go to work in the face of adversity each and every day and have complete trust that they are protected. As far as I am concerned a HUGE heart, integrity and lots of love comes with that kind of trust. I trust in the power that created me to protect me at all times and under all circumstances. Blessed be and so it is. Namaste.

 

With a sprinkle of fairy dust and may magic follow your day.

HUGE LOVE

Sonia

xxoo

14. Every moment presents a wonderful opportunity to become more of who I am.

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The now is all we have, this second this moment. Everything that happened in the past is exactly that anything that is about to happen will. So being the moment and in the now is such a precious gift to give to yourself and to those around you. Being you and the most authentic version of you is even more important. So often we walk through life being versions of what other people want us to be. We are playing the role of other identities that do not serve and ultimately we suffer in our own existence.  We sometimes make allowances or find excuses of who we think we should be.  When we “should” in our lives it compares to “shitting” on ourselves and not sure bout you but that doesn’t feel pleasant.

Life teaches us so much and each experience and moment that we have teaches us more about who we are. No matter what the experience is good or bad it allows us to show up and be who we really are. How do we know who we really are? I know for me this is something that I continue to discover and only until the separation of my last relationship did that really begin to unravel for me. To be perfectly honest I had thought that I had it all worked it out. My life was fine or as once defined to me (F*D UP INSECURE NEUROTIC EMOTIONAL MESS). It not for me to judge this time in my life and go back and do my head in about but the difference is the way I lead my life now is that I am totally comfortable with who I am. That doesn’t mean I stop learning. Actually it is quite the contrary.

Death of a family member shakes your world and turns it upside down. For me there is still so much to process and that is totally OK. For me it is also about a family that once was now has somebody missing it and life is never quite the same. That doesn’t have to make it bad. Instead what it does for me is to absolutely be me and unapologetically so. That doesn’t mean that I don’t give a rats about anybody else rather it makes me wants to grab life by the reins and live the life that we are meant to live. This means to take risks, make mistakes and love unconditionally. To remove the masks that make us comfortable, to move beyond our comfort zones and to know that being the most authentic version of you is the greatest gift that you can give yourself and to the world in which you live. Every moment presents a wonderful opportunity to become more of who I am. Blessed be and so it is so it is done. Namaste

 

With a sprinkle of fairy dust and may magic follow your day.

 

Sonia

Xoo

10. I am on a path where positive thinking and optimistic attitude guide all my choices.

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Thank Buddha\Allah\God\Me whoever that I am on this path! Back in February 2013 I began an experiment that I would turn anything negative in my life into a positive. There is a whole story attached to that year but quite frankly I much prefer to live in the now. What I can say is that it totally works and being mindful of every word and thought that we speak and think is huge on so many levels.  I was speaking with a friend today and we were speaking about situations in our lives, things that had happened and simply stuff. What we were both grateful about was that although situations may happen in our lives, and you may very well be upset offended it is the way that you deal with it that makes a huge difference.

You can choose to rant and rave about it or put your big girl undies, learn from it and speak lovingly rather than with distaste. A big lesson for me as I am know that there have been many occasions where I have participated in idle gossip or bitched and moaned about others. I am happy to eat humble pie, it doesn’t always taste great as it about you being vulnerable and uncomfortable but far out I would prefer that than staying the same. It is something I choose not to partake in any longer as the vibration of the energy does not resonate with me. More importantly it does not align with my values or compassion or being of service to humanity.

There are so many other issues in the world that require attention.  Today I learnt of the news that over 2,000 people were massacred in Nigeria. I have sat here for a while now and wondered how the hell I speak positively about that when all I feel is pure heartbreak and devastation for the precious souls that lost their loves to reckless and pointless killing. What I have been able to come up with is that it has further affirmed that I don’t want to waste time on “drama & stories”. Life is travelling at lightning speed and I want to live each moment doing what is of importance and significance. Idle gossip and “stuff” does not equate to justice and compassion. Sure “stuff & stories” will always come up but it is how they are dealt with that makes the difference and allows the positive outcomes and attitudes to occur. I am on a path where positive thinking and optimistic attitude guide all my choices. Blessed be and so it is. So it is done. Namaste.

With a sprinkle of fairy dust and may magic follow your day.

 

Sonia

Xoo

6. I offer those around me patience, encouragement, support, a cheerful word, the gift of a smile – and most of all appreciation.

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Being kind and compassionate to one another is a given. When we were born into this lifetime we were born with unconditional love. Along the way we learnt and adapted to so many things that did not come from love. These places could have been derived from fear, survival, whatever, it actually doesn’t matter. It is not a matter of blame, our parents or carers did the best that they knew how. What matters most now is our own personal responsibility and returning to the state of being that is love, truth, compassion and integrity. We gather so much crap along the way and if we don’t get rid of it and let it go our view point of the world becomes bitter and twisted and we only operate from fear and ego.

It is fairly easy to offer your loved ones patience, encouragement and support. For most people this state of being is simple. When I reflect on the affirmation for the day what comes to mind are the elderly people that live in our society. This is especially so for those who live with dementia. Dementia can be seen and felt as a cruel and debilitating disease. Having worked in the Aged Care Sector for almost 6 years I felt the pain of family members so often. I only said to my aunty the other day how much I miss working with people with dementia. There is something truly special about what we are able to learn from those that live in dementia. Feeling sorry and sad may be a natural reaction but connecting heart to heart is far more meaningful than most interactions that as human beings we exist with.

When I reflect on why I enjoyed working in Aged Care so much what resonates the most for me is being in the moment. Sometimes there are no words and what needs to be expressed can only be felt. There is communication beyond words and a connection that no matter how much memory loss that may appear to the surface the heart always feels. So whilst there is a beating heart there is always hope and faith.We don’t require words to feel.

So for today and every day offer appreciation, support, patience, encouragement and a smile to somebody that you may not normally. Get involved with some voluntary work if you feel, spend time with the elderly, do whatever is right for you. These are the small things that make the world we live in a brighter place.  I offer those around me patience, encouragement, support, a cheerful word, the gift of a smile – and most of all appreciation. Blessed be and so it is. So it is done. Namaste.

 

With a sprinkle of fairy dust and may magic follow your day.

Sonia

Xoo

3. I act with honour and integrity in all that I do.

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When I read the affirmation for today, my first thought was “of course I do!” It was almost a defensive response on my behalf so I sat with it for a while. What was conclusive is that whilst this is an area of my life that I feel works really well for me, there have certainly been times when this hasn’t always been the case. What I am referring to is that I haven’t acted with honour and integrity with myself and have placed myself in situations where perhaps I haven’t spoken up, where I haven’t admitted my true feelings or allowed behaviour in my life that did not reflect my values. Hindsight is awesome but no point in living in the past, it serves you no purpose.

We tend to associate integrity and honour as being “good” and “kind” to one another. This is very much the case but what I feel is most important is honour and integrity to self. As much as I would have like to have believed that for the last 20 or so years I have lived with honour and integrity in ALL that I do I can’t say that I have. Being in two long term relationships and not being true to self was not acting in honour and integrity. There were so many instances where I knew that I wasn’t being true to myself. I can see that now. As much as I knew that something didn’t feel right I stayed in situations that were not in alignment with my higher self, therefore not acting with integrity and honour.

Only recently I was confronted with situations with friendship and family circles. I chose not to say what I really felt. I was told “stuff” that I chose to ignore and partook in conversations that were not in integrity. Part of me didn’t want the drama but there was another part that simply didn’t act with honour and integrity. It is not about judgement but to feel with compassion that this is now an area of my life that I choose to act upon. It is a part of my life that I am now aware of and choose to live differently. It is not about making anybody or anything right or wrong rather knowing that when I act with honour and integrity in all that I do then my life can simply only mirror the same. I act with honour and integrity in all that I do. Blessed be and so it is. So it is done. Namaste

With a sprinkle of fairy dust and may magic follow your day.

Sonia

Xoo