17. “Be the change that you wish to see in the world.” ― Mahatma Gandhi

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A few days ago we woke to the news of a 22 year old that was murdered in Melbourne. She is the almost the same age as my niece and was killed in a part of Melbourne that I know all too well. It could have been anyone. My body reeled as it felt way too close to home. As the days have progressed there has been an outstanding amount of media coverage. I have reflected about the way it has made me feel. I feel sadness for the life that has been lost through a senseless death. It is wrong that there is so much fear and anxiety around feeling safe. What is even more pertinent are some of the messages that are being delivered. I have watched and read numerous news reports and can agree with what is being communicated. Let’s make no mistake; what happened to this young woman is unfathomable.

What has left me sitting in a space of wonder is the gender divide. There have been a number of issues that have been highlighted. The media has indicated that it is the behaviour of men that needs to change. I agree. It has also been described that women should not have to change their behaviour in order to be safe. I can also resonate with this. Where I feel unsettled is that it is primarily against men and rightly so in this case. I understand that there is an epidemic of domestic violence and that women are killed at the mercy of men. But on the flip side violence doesn’t discriminate. There is so much that we don’t hear about. It has been reported that 21 fathers die by suicide each week because of women who deny them access to their children.

I don’t want this to be a debate as I don’t disagree with the correspondence of the “news”. Instead what I am suggesting is that perhaps we need to come from a different viewpoint and understand that violence on any level is not acceptable. So many lives are lost every day in all parts of the world that include innocent children, men and women. There are countless deaths that we don’t hear about, yet one death that feels that it could be any of us and we rally to create change. Creating change is the catalyst and we are all responsible for the world we live in. It is not up to anyone else but ourselves to be the change that we want to see in the world.

Men are just as prone to violence as what women are and yet it feels like we are creating a greater divide. I could be totally wrong. This is only my viewpoint and what this current situation feels like for me. We want change yet what are we doing about it? Do we practice compassion, peace and loyalty in the way we live? How can we expect to achieve a state of love and peace when we don’t even have it our own lives? What are we doing each and every day to make the world a better place, to be of service and to be compassionate and loyal to each and every human being? I know that this has been a reminder for me to know that creating change with love, compassion and peace is what we are born to do. Blessed be and so it is.

With a sprinkle of fairy dust and may magic follow your day.

 

HUGE LOVE

 

Sonia

xoxox

16. Love is what and why I do everything – Michelle Edwards

 

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(beautiful Michelle in Bali)

I caught up with this inspiration of a woman yesterday. She has just returned from a whirlwind of a trip where she ran 84km across Bali. People came from across the globe to raise money for an organisation that supports an end to poverty through education. 84kms!!! I am lucky to be able to run 2 kilometres without stopping. I was in awe of her whole being light up as she spoke about her love of running and being of service. As I later watched some of the highlights from her run she spoke at the end of her 84km with so much courage and inspiration. I can barely breathe after 30 minutes of cardio! Her words resonated and I was filled with goose bumps and tears. “Love is what and why I do everything”.

I met Michelle a few months ago. We literally bumped into each a few days ago and decided to finally catch up for that coffee that we had been meaning to have. I am so grateful that we did. It was such a perfect reminder about life and why we are here. Ultimately as far as I am concerned we are all responsible to make the world a better place. For most of us we live in a very fortunate place with more than we could ever possibly need. I am aware that there are a lot of people that are doing it tough and I am by no means undermining this for others. Instead I have seen this as a huge reminder mostly to myself. Is love what and why I do everything? Our lives are so precious and short so why would we possibly have it any other way.

Michelle and I largely spent most of our “coffee time” together speaking about being of service. What joy we have both received being in a country less fortunate than ours doing something that we love. I couldn’t remember the last time that I had spoken about the work that I do in Cambodia or more importantly dedicating specific time and energy into a place that has filled my heart with so much love. If we are not doing everything with love are we living from a place of fear?

I am not claiming to know all the answers nor am I professing to know it all. Far from it and we are always learning and evolving. I know that the last few weeks I have been settling and grounding into what my life now is. With that has also come of me being in my head and not my heart. Sometimes we need to be there in order to realign to where we need to be. Yesterday for me was a little nudge a small reminder of what life truly means to me. It was an opportunity to reconnect me to my “why” in life. I know that connection to self and others is fundamental to our human existence. Without out we can feel lost and empty. When we truly know that we are all connected it is then that we can truly know and feel that everything we do is from a place of love. Blessed be and so it is.

With a sprinkle of fairy dust and may magic follow your day.

 

HUGE LOVE
Sonia

xoxox

15. “mise en place”

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This word “mise en place” was mentioned to me a week or so ago and I loved the sound of it. I love words so I was intrigued to know what it meant. It is generally used in professional kitchens and signifies that everything is in its place before service. The word resonated and according to wikepedia it states that “it is a French culinary phrase which means “putting inplace” or “everything in its place” I like the feel of the word and for now it also has a vibration that I want to write about. What does it look and feel like for everything to be in its place? I can appreciate that the true meaning of the word quite possibly connects better to a professional kitchen but for the sake of my blog today I am going to write about what it feels like for me.

For the last 6 or so weeks life has changed and that is OK, except with that comes a somewhat uproar of emotions at any given time. They don’t have to be good or bad they simply just need to be. What I do know is that there is a lot of new in ways in which I have not experienced before. To be perfectly honest it has thrown me a bit off balance but in a way that is allowing me to grow. I have found myself with an unsettlement in the pit of my tummy. It is nerves, excitement, and or fear? I am not sure really but whatever it is I have to know and trust that everything is in its place. If I start to identify it as being right or wrong then there is judgement and no room for growth.

When we truly feel what is going on for us then we allow love and not fear to be behind the intent of all that we do. When there is that feeling in the pit of our stomach it is sometimes easy to ignore. We can shove it down or we can explore and see what happens with it. For me there are waves of emotions that can come up at any given time. I am a sensitive being. Fortunately or not when something is going on for me I can at times be consumed by the thoughts that flurry around in my head. Not a happy or conducive place for anyone to be in. It is not to be judged rather recognised as what is being triggered and a time to heal, grow and create. If we can trust that everything is in its place then life tends to flow with grace and ease. The feeling of being stuck dissipates and we can fully surrender. For me a whole lot of overwhelm has filled my body of late and perhaps it is rightly so. The thing with that is that I can allow it to consume me or I can simply know that everything is in its place. When life is in place it doesn’t have to be a bunch of roses it can simply just be. For when we find the magic and gratitude of simplicity and connecting back to self it is then we can truly feel that everything is its place within our own hearts and soul. Blessed be and so it is.

 

With a sprinkle of fairy dust and may magic follow your day.

 

HUGE LOVE

 

Sonia

xoxoxo

14. The Accidental Finding of Treasure – Clarissa Pinkola Estes

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I was driving into a shopping centre yesterday; I hadn’t been there before so I was driving in a careful and possibly slower manner than what I would normally. The guy behind me ever so eloquently “beeped” and mouthed that I should hurry up. Being the quiet wallflower that I am my response although he didn’t hear was far from precious. As I heard myself cuss, I actually took myself by surprise. I attempted to do some laundry later that day and managed to somehow trip over nothing and spill pretty much a whole bottle of laundry liquid. I didn’t notice that I had knocked it at first. It was until it was seeping into my shorts that I realised what I had done and by this stage it was pretty much all over the bathroom floor. I growled a profanity and went to the beach instead. This morning I attempted and eventually succeeded to pay a Medicare bill online. Sounds rather simple I would say. The computer didn’t recognise my address; I had to download an app and almost give blood. Well not really I just thought I would continue being dramatic for a little while.

So clearly things are not in flow. Mishaps, falls and whatever else feel like a little sign, well for me it does anyway. I am pretty conscious of my own behaviours, thoughts and feelings. I believe that things happen for us and not to us. I could go on about the driver that reared his profanities or I could use it as an opportunity that allowed me to stop and take an account of what was and is going on for me. By the way I haven’t got it figured out. What I do know are the simple facts of where life has flowed in the last couple of days. To add insult to injury I also got two parking fines this week.

So I could make this blog about all the “stuff” that has happened and what a crappy last couple of days it has been or I can choose to focus on the relevance of what life brings. As “shitty” as it feels to receive a parking fine and sit in a pile of laundry liquid, I am able to sit back and reconnect to what is real and what is my perception. What is real is the love and gratitude that lives and all the beauty that my life is surrounded with.

So where frustration lies is always seeking an opportunity for growth and connection. As humans I feel that it is important and necessary to experience all the feelings that arise within us. No point in shoving them for they just appear in different ways. For me right now I am grateful for all the crappy or not so crappy stuff that happened this week. It is an awesome time to process, reflect and throw more love out into the world. For sometimes it is only when we disconnect from life that we are able to reconnect from a deeper place of passion and purpose. Blessed be and so it is.

With a sprinkle of fairy dust and may magic follow your day.

HUGE LOVE

Sonia

xxxo

13. “Connect to the whispers of your soul for this is where the magic transpires” Sonia Muraca

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I am not even sure what it is that I am going to write about today but what I do know is that I need to write. It is Sunday morning and the last few weeks have been a bit of a whirlwind. I have started a new job, moved in to a new home and getting used to the changes that life brings. I was speaking to a friend yesterday and she asked how I coped with change. For me change is something that needs to happen in order for growth to occur. I really don’t know any other way and for the last 12 or so months change has been constant.  Living so close to the ocean has lent itself to the ebbs, flows and sometimes waves that change brings. With this I have been in touch with what is going on for me eternally.

I know that when I feel the need to write it is also a time and space where I need to connect to self. I have found myself being “busy” in the last few weeks, such is life and that is perfectly OK. It is important to acknowledge that our inner selves and soul deserve time to truly nurture and listen to the whispers of connecting back to self. For me it is truly about being present and being able to give from a place of a full heart.

Yesterday morning I left home bright and early to go to exercise. I was a little grumpy and would have much preferred to stay in bed. The mornings are starting to be fresh and I just wanted to snuggle under the doona.  My conscious got the better of me and I got up. As I left home the magnificence of the sun was rising. The array of glistening oranges and yellows beamed from the sky. I was instantly in the moment of the magic and was in awe of how glorious Mother Nature and life truly is. It was at that point that I realised how much I had been rushing around, that my body was tired and weary and that I hadn’t being fully present.

I have learnt too much in life to know that berating oneself does nothing but create more “stuff”. Not sure about you but I’m not really interested in self-sabotage. I much prefer to notice the lesson, process what needs to happen and continue to be in flow. So whilst I had no idea what was going to transpire prior to me writing all I knew was that I needed to write. It is my soul’s way of whispering to stay present, be still, and listen to the calls of what is truly needed. For when we don’t connect to ourselves we cannot possibly connect to anything else. Life is truly precious and it is in the simplest of what life offers that often bring us the most magic. It is the laughter of children and the rising of the sun. From the sweetest of cuddles, the welcoming smiles and the connection to self and others that surmounts to the true meaning of what life has to offer. Connect to the whispers of your soul for this is where the magic transpires. Blessed be and so it is.

With a sprinkle of fairy dust and may magic follow your day.

 

HUGE LOVE

 

Sonia

xoxo

 

 

12. I only own my mind – I am mine – Pearl Jam

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A friend sent me this song this morning, the lyrics resonated and I connected with it. I am not sure why she sent it. There was no message just the song. I know and feel our connection beyond distance so I know that it was something that I needed to hear. I start a new job tomorrow and I am feeling beyond nervous. I was chatting to a friend yesterday and expressed that I was starting to feel anxious about it all. She reminded me to look at it as an exciting new chapter. So when I heard and felt the song this morning I felt that it was a little reminder to really be in the moment about the new chapter that I begin tomorrow. I am not a magician and nor do I have a magic wand to switch off my thoughts but what I can achieve is awareness.

As I write my blog for the day I am jolted into a different reality. I can hear the news about the chemical war fare in Syria. I am watching people being hosed down in an attempt to wash the chemicals in which they have been attacked with.  I could go on and on about the pure injustice about the war that is happening and the suffering that our world goes through. I am not sure that it would actually achieve anything except more of the same energy that exacerbates injustice.

As the lyrics of the song indicate – I only own my mind [1]– I can only control what happens to my thoughts and words. I cannot and nor do I want to change the mind of others. That is not my job nor is it my business. I can only act in my highest integrity and come from a place of loyalty and respect in all that I do. For me the most significant reminder has been to really focus on what matters most. I can’t change the chemical warfare in Syria and nor can I do anything for the children that have been doused with chemicals. Feeling anxious or nervous about a new job now seems so irrelevant.

I am not indicating that feelings are insignificant. In fact we have to allow them to vibrate through our being. When we shove them down they eventually transpire into something, somewhere along our path. The stuff that is happening is Syria leaves me feeling broken and a little helpless about the world. There is so much that I do feel especially when I see children suffering. I feel the grief of not having my own children, I feel that no human being should ever have to be exposed to that level of suffering and I feel the injustice.

So for now I can make a choice to own my mind and thoughts. I can either spend the day in suffering about what the morning has presented with or I can create a different awareness and ensure that I am living love and peace in all that I do. I may not be able to stop the war but as the lyrics of the Pearl Jam resonate I can evoke for myself that “I was born and I know that I’ll die
the in between is mine – I am mine” – Blessed be and so it is.

 

With a sprinkle of fairy dust and may magic follow your day.

 

HUGE LOVE

Sonia

xoxoxox

 

[1] https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PVho74SDOis

11. And the day came when the risk to remain tight in a bud was more painful that the risk it took to blossom – Anais Nin.

Quote About Pay No Attention To What People Say. Pay Very Close

I woke this morning with a heavy head and feeling restless. One of the things I love most about where I live is that I can see the beach as soon as I walk out of my bedroom.  I walk across the road and the ocean is in front of me, it immediately soothes my soul. I’m not quite sure how I managed before. It all feels different now and for so many reasons. What I do know is that I can take a walk to the beach and instantly my being feels harmonious and at peace. Nothing else seems to matter at that point other than the roar of the waves and the sand between my toes. Sounds super corny I know, but it is how I feel.

As I watched the sun rise I felt the promise of a brand new day with no expectations other than to light up the sky and shine its magnificent light. I know when I do have a heavy head writing is something that allows me to empty my thoughts, to see again with fresh eyes and a new perspective. I have been doing a lot of reflecting and processing in the last few days. A lot of changes have taken place and for now I have finally stopped and have been able to embrace the new.

So as I sat this morning feeling restless I knew that writing would allow me to be present. I came across this quote and connected with what it felt like for me. Change is inevitable and it is what we create with it that makes a difference. The last 9 months I have moved to a different state, moved into shared accommodation, moved out on my own, found a job, left a job and about to start a new one. I have felt heart ache and opened up to new love. The emotions connected to it all have been somewhat overwhelming at times and the ocean my best friend. The outpour of what I have been able to explore in that time is a knowing that I can never go back to what was and nor do I want to.

Remaining in a tight bud doesn’t really work for me. I’m not really sure it is meant to work for anyone. Instead what I do know is the gift of risk far outweighs the pain of staying the same. It is not always an easy path. The stirring of emotions can at times avalanche into a mixture of pain, and growth ultimately leading to a new found path of peace. A feeling and place that allows you to feel the rhythm of your own soul and to hear the whispers clearly, for this is where self-love truly blossoms.  Blessed be and so it is.

 

With a sprinkle of fairy dust and may magic follow your day

 

HUGE LOVE

Sonia xxo

10. You are only free when you realise you belong no place- you belong every place-no place at all. The price is high. The reward is great – Maya Angelou

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I have come across this statement by Maya Angelou quite a few times as I have been reading the book, Braving the Wilderness by Brene` Brown. It is still a passage of writing that leaves me pondering with much to explore. The feeling of belonging for me is exactly where I am, even though I am living in another state away from my family andall that I have ever known. However I have connected with a network of people and places and meeting some super special people along the way. Most importantly I have come back to me.

So for now this is where I belong. I have just moved into my own place on the Gold Coast and my life and home is here now. Don’t get me wrong the last 8 months has been a trial of tribulations. It has been a plethora of experiences that have allowed me to find a new level of freedom that I haven’t experienced before.  At times life hasn’t been entirely pleasant, however I don’t regret any of these experiences because without them I wouldn’t be where I am right now. For now as I write my blog I can see the ocean and the feeling of belonging completely to me overwhelms my being.

It doesn’t mean that I have stopped learning or that the lessons will no longer present. Instead it is about succumbing to the moment, to what is presented, to take the risk, the leap of faith and to simply live love. We are ever changing. This is the true beautiful, inspiring and authentic dishevelled yet beautiful mess that we are here to be.

So when I reflect on the statement about belonging to every place but no place at all, it is starting to make sense. When I first read it I know that It felt to different to the way that it feels right now, I can only guess that in 6 or 12 months’ time that it may feel different again. For now it means that where I am is exactly where I am meant to be and the reward is great. I live across the road to the ocean and for this is the truest sense of belonging. I wake to the roar of the waves and I am overwhelmed with gratitude for this is what home and belonging truly feels for me.

This is not a lesson that I set out to discover instead it is one in which I continue to unravel and is ever-changing. It is a collective of experiences that lead us to a place of belonging, not only to where we are but ultimately coming home to ourselves. For when we are home within ourselves the epitome of freedom is delivered. Blessed be and so it is.

With a sprinkle of fairy dust and may magic follow your day

 

HUGE LOVE

Sonia

xoxox

 

9. When I speak up it is a win win for everyone involved. – Emily Gower

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A few months ago I had a mentoring session with an author. It was about my writing and the direction that I would like to go with that aspect of my life. It was a great session and prompted me in areas of my life that I hadn’t visited before. When you invest the time, energy and effort into the relationship that you have with yourself then it is only a natural reaction that life tends to flow with some grace and ease. Well for me it does anyway.

One of the things that did come up for me was speaking up. Funny huh! For those that know me relatively well I would daresay that they would consider me not having an issue in this area. I was only speaking to someone recently about not yelling or arguing anymore. It felt like such a foreign concept and one that my body did not respond to well. Look let’s make no mistake, I certainly haven’t been an angel in the past and yelling and pointless arguing was something that I once participated in.

Life inevitably happens. You learn lessons and understand that drama is futile. I would much prefer a conscious, courageous conversation. In saying that I am also Italian and totally own the dramatic hand gestures and arm throwing that I have been told I indulge in at times. Ok so I own all parts of me, imperfectly perfect I like to call it.

So somehow along the lines of life I had managed to create a belief pattern that when I speak my truth people leave. I hadn’t just plucked this out of nowhere; it was indeed what had happened in some past relationships\friendships. Now let’s not go down the rabbit hole of where all this came from, for that is way too dramatic. Just kidding! It is probably best to understand this pattern.

I know that as a young woman, culturally it was certainly never encouraged to speak out. It was something that wasn’t looked upon favorably and in fact “answering back” usually came with consequences. Not sure that this quite worked for dad because as a family of 6 girls we can all be pretty opinionated and outspoken. That is not to say that any of it is right or wrong but understanding where our “stuff” comes from then allows us to create a new path.

So when I identified with my mentor that this was an area that had come up from me in the past we created a new belief pattern. What this allowed me to know and truly feel that the people that are meant to be in my life will. For those that are not able to sit with me in my truth then perhaps they are not meant to. It is not about judging or finger pointing. It is about recognising and not blaming others for what resides within us. This is the true essence of freedom. For if we are not living from a place of integrity in all of our actions we are not showing up to shine our light and live love. When I speak up it is a win win for everyone involved. Blessed be and so it is.

With a sprinkle of fairy dust and may magic follow your day.

 

HUGE LOVE

Sonia

xo

8. “When given the choice between being right or being kind choose kind.”

 

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I watched Wonder with my roomie last night. It was the perfect weather to be home on a Saturday night to watch a movie. With Maltesers and Twisties in tow, we assumed our positions on the couch, watched and cried as the lessons unveiled and the story of a very special young boy was told. A true account of what one’s tribulations can offer the world in the most magical of ways. When life presents outside the “norm”, whatever that even means it seems to throw a lot of things into a flurry. For “Auggie” the main character of the movie the so called deformities on his face made his life hard and painful and equally beautiful.

As I watched I thought of my funny, open hearted sister. I winced at the amount of times she has been stared at or eyes have glazed upon her with someone trying to figure out “what is wrong with her”. There is absolutely nothing wrong with her. In fact she is one of the most amazing human beings that I will ever know. What she teaches the world that she lives in far outweighs any label of disability. People that know and love her undoubtedly feel that but for those that gaze and encounter her otherwise it can sometimes be cruel and unkind.

The quote that I am writing from today is one that was prevalent throughout the movie and one that I have heard a couple of times in the last few weeks. It is simple yet one that we seem to miss every now and again. I have certainly gotten better at deciphering between being right and kind but every now and then it seeps in. That is OK as long as I don’t live there and choose kindness. When it comes to my sister the protective wolf comes in and I am not quite sure that I have always chosen kindness, instead opting to be right. Up until last night I felt that it was my right to be her voice and I always will be. Choosing kindness and understanding far outweighs the ripple effect of being right.

Sometimes it is the smallest of encounters that make up the big stuff. It could be the person that cut you off in traffic, or the sales assistant that wasn’t helpful. Are you choosing kindness or being right?  Trust me there are many a time where I have chosen the latter and I am happy to own my stuff but upon reflection it is not conducive. We are human and we don’t have to beat ourselves up over things we think we should or shouldn’t be doing. Instead awareness and understanding is what ultimately leads us to a place of peace and freedom within ourselves. Life will always present us with stuff but ultimately it is what we choose that makes the difference. “When given the choice between being right or being kind choose kind.” Blessed be and so it is.

With a sprinkle of fairy dust and may magic follow your day

HUGE LOVE

Sonia

xo