3. Be the change you want to see in the world – GHANDI

4a93bbe08ca9aa806e169ddd428ee05d

I have been working the community services for the last 15 or so years. I have generally loved the jobs that I have had and have always done them with passion and purpose. That is not to say that I am a bag of roses each and every day when I go into work.  In fact some days are led by frustration and systems that don’t necessarily work and choose to keep people stuck. This blog isn’t about politics or the system rather it has come from a place of sheer frustration that requires some change.

My positions have ranged in aged care, mental health and disability. Funnily enough just over 10 years ago I worked for the same organisation in Melbourne that I am now working on the Gold Coast.  Funny or not I feel like I may have very well come full circle. Sure some things may have changed in terms of the way services are delivered but the same issues are still persistent. This is most definitely not a political rant although I am sure I could very well go there.

I have been frustrated at annoyed at what I like to call “the system” for such a long time and for a myriad of reasons. The main one being is that at the crux of it there seems to be a loss of connection with the people that we are providing a service for. My feeling of frustration and somewhat resentment comes from the conversations, the struggles and the issues that are presented when we are working with vulnerable people. This isn’t isolated to one specific event or organisation rather my personal experience and reflection when working for a service and also in receiving one.

My younger sister lives with an intellectual disability and my primary passion for being able to work effectively within services and “the system” has arisen from her. In saying that I feel that my life work is about social justice and allowing everybody to have the choice to live their life in the way that they choose. This is not to say that places and organisations do not exist, instead what it means is some of my experiences continue to be the contrary.

So do I continue to complain or take action and make a difference? I know that doing what you have always done, always gets you what you have always got. I don’t have the answers nor do I have the solutions right now and I know that Rome wasn’t built in a day. However what I do know is that I can’t keep complaining about it. We all have the ability to create change. So for now I am putting it out there, doing some research, asking questions and most importantly reaching out. Our universe needs so much love, connection and personal responsibility right now. Mother Earth is suffering, we lose someone to suicide every 4 hours, 22 fathers take their lives every week due to parental alienation and today I learnt about the loneliness epidemic that exists in our world as a major health issue. Be the change you want to see in the world. Blessed be and so it is.

With a sprinkle of fairy dust and may magic follow your day.

 

HUGE LOVE

Sonia

xoxoxo

14. The Accidental Finding of Treasure – Clarissa Pinkola Estes

31065377_1009345245881726_7247472534193438720_n e0e9472b31001c11143cfe64a4e2d142

 

I was driving into a shopping centre yesterday; I hadn’t been there before so I was driving in a careful and possibly slower manner than what I would normally. The guy behind me ever so eloquently “beeped” and mouthed that I should hurry up. Being the quiet wallflower that I am my response although he didn’t hear was far from precious. As I heard myself cuss, I actually took myself by surprise. I attempted to do some laundry later that day and managed to somehow trip over nothing and spill pretty much a whole bottle of laundry liquid. I didn’t notice that I had knocked it at first. It was until it was seeping into my shorts that I realised what I had done and by this stage it was pretty much all over the bathroom floor. I growled a profanity and went to the beach instead. This morning I attempted and eventually succeeded to pay a Medicare bill online. Sounds rather simple I would say. The computer didn’t recognise my address; I had to download an app and almost give blood. Well not really I just thought I would continue being dramatic for a little while.

So clearly things are not in flow. Mishaps, falls and whatever else feel like a little sign, well for me it does anyway. I am pretty conscious of my own behaviours, thoughts and feelings. I believe that things happen for us and not to us. I could go on about the driver that reared his profanities or I could use it as an opportunity that allowed me to stop and take an account of what was and is going on for me. By the way I haven’t got it figured out. What I do know are the simple facts of where life has flowed in the last couple of days. To add insult to injury I also got two parking fines this week.

So I could make this blog about all the “stuff” that has happened and what a crappy last couple of days it has been or I can choose to focus on the relevance of what life brings. As “shitty” as it feels to receive a parking fine and sit in a pile of laundry liquid, I am able to sit back and reconnect to what is real and what is my perception. What is real is the love and gratitude that lives and all the beauty that my life is surrounded with.

So where frustration lies is always seeking an opportunity for growth and connection. As humans I feel that it is important and necessary to experience all the feelings that arise within us. No point in shoving them for they just appear in different ways. For me right now I am grateful for all the crappy or not so crappy stuff that happened this week. It is an awesome time to process, reflect and throw more love out into the world. For sometimes it is only when we disconnect from life that we are able to reconnect from a deeper place of passion and purpose. Blessed be and so it is.

With a sprinkle of fairy dust and may magic follow your day.

HUGE LOVE

Sonia

xxxo

5. The weaving of connection is what allows our souls to soar– Sonia Muraca

img_5093

A few weeks ago I received a message from a friend’s sister whom I have never met and lives on the other side of the world in Greece. She resonated with what I had written about and we shared and exchanged parts of our life that we may not have otherwise. There is no particular rhyme or reason as to why I write I just know that it is something that my soul yearns to do. I have had a really restless night sleep and am feeling a little disconnected to myself so I do what I know how and write. Writing always connects me back to my heart and gets me out of my monkey mind. The weaving of connection as humans it is one of the most important aspects of how we live our lives. Although I have never met my beautiful friend’s sister I feel very connected to her. We are able to share our moments of vulnerability and give each other the gift of strength and courage. Connections like these are rare and ones that I hold dear and near to my heart.

What is it about these connections that dig deep and are felt far and wide? Is it that our souls recognise each other and those we are here to teach and learn from? Or is it simply to love in a way that inspires and generates more love? I don’t do shallow and superficial well. I have been told many a time that my face and expressions indicate exactly where I am at. To be perfectly frank I am glad that this is the case because pretending doesn’t work well for me at all. I would much rather have connecting conversations with a complete stranger that leave you feeling full and inspired opposed to countless conversations about drama and toxicity.

Connection for me is what gives our life purpose. If we are not connecting to each other and most importantly ourselves then do we just exist? I am going to be 44 this year. Being in my 40’s has been the best part of my life so far. I have been able to connect to myself, nature and people in ways that I have not experienced before. It is the epitome of freedom and what my souls years for the most.  I don’t have the energy to do otherwise. When I am not in flow my energy and connection to self dissipates and I find myself in a lower vibration that does not align. I recognise that I am wearing my grumpy pants or those that love me tell me that I am. I tend not to look after myself as well as what I would like to and I can spend copious amounts of time binging on Netflix. It is not about judging any of these experiences; we can’t have one without the other. As long as we are able to recognise the differences of where we are at, then we can come to understand that we are here to experience and cherish the essence of what life is truly about. The weaving of connection is what allows our souls to soar. Blessed be and so it is. So it is done.

With a sprinkle of fairy dust and may magic follow your day.

HUGE LOVE

Sonia

xoxox

2. If you could change the world, what would it be? – Sonia Muraca

Fab Quote power to change the world

It is funny or not how life manifests. We set an intention and we have no idea how it may or may not transpire. When our soul speaks to us we can only ignore it for so long. Our cousin chose to go home almost three years ago, still that feeling of anguish sits in my being, but it can’t always live there. As a family we turned our attention outwards and organised a fundraiser in her honour. It wasn’t so much about raising money but most importantly about awareness. The money that we did raise went into a community that our cousin was connected to. Our vision was that they would be able to connect to more people. I knew at that time that there was something more that had to be done about suicide.

Ultimately we can’t stop any being from doing what is their choice. Instead what I can do is recognise that a loss of connection to self, can lead to a very dark path. Dark doesn’t have to be good or bad. It is an opportunity to find visit the depths of our souls and discover our truth. Behind the pain there are lessons to be learnt and joy to be found, if this is what we allow. For so many the pain is too deep or hurts too much and that is not for me to judge or tell you otherwise. I have been great at burying and shoving stuff down but you know what it resurfaces and generally when we least expect it.

As the fundraiser progressed so did #connecttocreatechange#. I have had some ideas swirling around for months now and after having a chat with my mentor this week I know that there is a bigger picture. I work in the area of suicide prevention and awareness and my passion about people not taking their own lives is one that I feel I am meant to do. Almost every 3 hours in Australia a precious life is lost to suicide. A figure that I still can’t quite comprehend nor do I want to. This isn’t about saving lives rather it is about creating more conscious connections with ourselves and each other.

I began writing this blog a few days ago and wasn’t sure where it was going. As I sit and finish my blog a few days later I have had a moment of clarity. For the last four or so years I have written simply because I love to write, it is also a part of who I am. It allows me to connect to my heart space and unleash what is going on in my sometimes monkey mind. I would love and invite you to be a part of #connecttocreatechange#. It is time to show up, be vulnerable and ask for your input, ideas and thoughts on how you feel change can be created. Sometimes it is the simplest of gestures that can change someones life forever. If you could change the world, what would it be?  Never underestimate the strength and power of humanity, kindness and love. Blessed be and so it is. So it is done.

With a sprinkle of fairy dust and may magic follow your day.

HUGE LOVE

 

Sonia

xoxox

1. Vulnerability is our most accurate measurement of courage – Brene Brown

25446476_938589839623934_2610992832859783417_nVulnerability is our most accurate measurement of courage – Brene Brown

Writing for me is a part of who I am. Without it I am not sure where my life would be right now. It takes me to a place where nothing else matters. The purpose of my blog is to write with a compassionate heart especially on the days that I don’t want to. Today is one of those days and I am reminded that these are the times that I need to dig deep and change my perspective of where my head space it at. My body is tired and all I want do is climb under my doona and sleep. I live in Queensland now and the weather doesn’t allow doona kind of days. I could potentially continue to lie on the couch and feel sorry for myself or I can write. Clearly this is what I have chosen.

To be vulnerable is not something that we are taught to do. We are often told that we need to be strong, that we need to have it all together or that we need to feel a certain way. That doesn’t really work for me. It is tiring and consuming to be someone who we are not. I would choose raw and real any day. To be vulnerable is one of the greatest gifts that we can possibly give ourselves and others. I really don’t believe we were meant to live our lives having to do it all on our own.

I was having a conversation with my roomies a few days ago and we were talking about our ideal relationship and what expectations we have not only on ourselves but on others. The conversation that took place is one that has left me pondering. We all want to be independent people and not have any expectations from others but does that in turn can leave us isolated and not emotionally available.

What if we took off the masks and just presented exactly as we were. To openly admit what it is that we are feeling without being afraid of being hurt or judged. For it to be perfectly ok to have days when we just can’t adult. We seem to forget that we can’t have one without the other. Where there is light there is darkness and on the days that it is too dark we can use the light of others to ignite what we need.

For me my needs right now are simple. A meal that is being cooked, for me to openly admit that I am not feeling the best I can be and to accept the love and warmth from those around me. Sometimes it isn’t that simple and showing up as we are can scary. But what if it wasn’t and what if our imperfections were actually perfect. Vulnerability is our most accurate measurement of courage. Blessed be and so it is, so it is done.

With a sprinkle of fairy dust and may magic follow your day.

 

HUGE LOVE

Sonia

xxxo

18. Home is not a place it is a feeling

22546936_835102173323138_1648187247_o

 

I have been living on the Gold Coast for just over three months.  It has been a plethora of emotions that I seem to untangle and construct on a sometimes daily basis. I love being so close to the ocean. Knowing that I can walk 5 minutes to be so close to the roaring waves brings so much joy to my heart. On the flip side I miss my family, friends and the familiarity that I know.  Some days are harder than others. Being away from all that I know has also forced to go deeper within myself and to feel truly at home no matter where I am. It has taught me to dig to depths that I haven’t visited before and grow to a different sense of self.

When I am being challenged in life I also take it as an opportunity to learn and understand what it means for me. It doesn’t mean that I have to analyse the crap out of it and do my own head in. instead I am able to feel what it is that is going on for me and allow myself to take responsibility for growth and understanding. Too often in life when we are presented with “stuff” that is painful or difficult to digest we shove it down or distract ourselves with whatever else. To feel pain is uncomfortable and we do anything possible to avoid it. We learn so much from a place of pain and for me it is where growth really happens if we allow it.

It is relatively easy for us to live in our heads, it is comfortable and it is safe up there, quite frankly it gives me a headache. Living from our hearts and being connected is love living. So when I connect to the place of feeling of home at times it is what I know. What I have come to understand is that feeling of home is living from your heart which may not always be easy to do. It can feel far more comfortable to lash out, blame and avoid. For me it is a daily practise and reminder of what life essentially is.  There will always be situations and interactions that we are presented with. It has the potential to take us away from living love if this is what we allow. Or we can choose to sit in our pain, hurt, grief or whatever uncomfortable feeling we are shown and grow from the experience.

So when I connect to home, I feel what it is like to be surrounded by my mad, crazy, loud and fun loving family. They are what I have known for the last 43 years, I miss them like crazy at times and yearn for the comfort that I know so well. The other side of that is remaining connected to who I am and feeling at home in my heart no matter where I am. Being pushed out of my comfort zone also take me to a place of discovery and this is where the magic truly happens. Home is not a place, it is a feeling. Blessed be and so it is.

 

With a sprinkle of fairy dust and may magic follow your day

 

HUGE LOVE

Sonia

xoxoxo

 

 

17. We accept the love we think we deserve – Stephen Chbosky

21270925_888389084644010_5093470574274513293_n

 

Love comes to us in various ways. For me the most important kind of love is the love and relationship that I have with myself. It hasn’t always been a great relationship but as time passes and lessons are learnt my love for self deepens to a different space and time.  I was listening to a pod cast the other day by Matt Kahn (awesome stuff by the way). He was talking about relationships, twin flames and soul mates. I was travelling back home from Brisbane to the Gold Coast on the train. I had just attended a Suicide Prevention Forum and was pondering life (as you do). It was a heavy day and one that left me feeling drained but somewhat hopeful about the difference that we all need to be making in the world. As I watched the world go his words reverberated. “At the first sign of abuse the soul contract is over”

His words jolted me out of what I was feeling and I realised how many times I had so easily accepted abuse in my life. When I speak of abuse it doesn’t necessarily mean the most obvious kinds. Abuse can come in many ways and sometimes it appears in the most subdued ways. I thought about the endless time especially in relationships when I allowed this to happen. Not the most pleasant of memories but ones that have allowed me to grow and learn. We can certainly go into drama and stories of who did what and where but I refuse to give any more of my precious air time. Instead I can reflect on the lesson of “we accept the love we think we deserve”. I am deserving of open communication, trust, loyalty, time and respect. So if that is not presented it is time for the soul contract to be over. The lesson is so clear. I can blame or I can simply know that the contract is over for my highest good.

Reflection is paramount to any given situation. I have learnt from experience to walk away and to understand what role that I had to play in any given situation. Personal responsibility is a lesson that I continue to learn. It doesn’t make what the other person did right or wrong, instead it shifts the power to enable growth and understanding. We only attract what we need to learn. So recently when I was dealt with a situation, I knew that there were aspects that I could only grow from. I could use the opportunity and allow myself growth from a place that I haven’t been before. This is where the magic truly happens.

Sometimes the lessons aren’t always obvious to begin and if we get stuck we can just go around and around in a vicious circle. Not sure about you but I have no interest in giving anyone my time and energy that is not worthy. I have learnt that hurt people, hurt people and we all have our own lives to lead. We learn at the perfect time for own evolvement and growth. It is only my responsibility to self that is important.  We accept the love we think we deserve. Blessed be and so it is.

 

With a sprinkle of fairy dust and may magic follow your day.

 

HUGE LOVE

Sonia

xoxoxoxo

14. “Don’t just fly, soar

19748710_854214561394796_6629215449478727865_n

 

The other day I came across a magnet with the words “Don’t just fly, soar” I loved what it meant and it really resonated with what I was feeling. I decided to buy it as a little gift for my new home. I got to the counter and paid for my items. Somehow the magnet flicked off the bench and broke. I wasn’t sure whether to laugh or cry. I had already paid for it and the lady behind the counter simply just said “oh”. I suppose there wasn’t too much else to say. There really wasn’t too much that I could do other than pick it up and put it in the bin.

As I walked away I couldn’t help but feel somewhat annoyed that I had just broken an item that I had just purchased. I know first world problems! As I caught myself feeling that I was in such a first world problem kind of mind frame I recognised that it was also an opportunity to learn a lesson. I must say that the learning these days seem to appear pretty quickly. I am grateful for the agility of these moments. I could have taken the broken magnet as a sign that perhaps I wasn’t ready to soar. (Such a victim mentality and story) Instead I turned it around and recognised that I didn’t need a magnet to know and recognise my worth. Or it could have just possibly meant a magnet fell and broke. Whatever! It is doesn’t actually matter, rather it is how we choose to spend the moments that matter the most.

How we choose to interpret what is going on around us is what is most poignant in our growth. We choose whatever it is that we want to see. It possibly makes the difference in whether we are just flying or soaring. I can choose to see a broken magnet or I can truly come to know and understand that I have managed to learn a lesson, distinguish growth and fly that little bit higher than I did a few days ago. We are the creator of whatever it is that we choose to do and I am learning this thick and fast these days. I have no distractions, there are no “other” things for me to do and I am in the moments of what matters most.

What this also means is the difference between flying and soaring. I can choose to be in flight or I can soar to places that I have never been before. Trust me I don’t have it all worked out because I am being pushed beyond a zone that I have not known. A place that there is no familiarity or reference points to a life that I once knew. It is fun and exciting? Yes for most of the time it is but there is also the other part that is emotional and overwhelming. We can’t have one without the other. So why would we just fly when we can truly soar to heights of life that hold limitless potential. Blessed be and so it is.

 

With a sprinkle of fairy dust and may magic follow your day

 

HUGE LOVE

 

Sonia

xoxxo

13. F.E.A.R – Face everything and rise.

e8db514ae2e1d7287f4e79c2b27a3189--quotes-about-relationships-relationship-fear-quotes

So I made the big move to Gold Coast Queensland and have been here just under a week.  I felt really compelled to write this morning as it always puts me in a place of grounding and alignment. What came to me was the juxtaposition of what the word fear can actually mean. I don’t recall where I heard that FEAR can also mean “Face everything and rise” and nor does it actually matter. What is important for me right now is how it resonates and where I choose to place my energy.

The Gold Coast is a picture of paradise. I could certainly spend the next 400 or so words about the picturesque settings that I am in total awe of. Instead what feels more important is to appreciate the contrast of what Queensland means to me right now and how I am feeling in the face of fear. Fear is paralysing and stops us from living love and from our hearts. When we live from our head space it is debilitating and sends us into a spiral of chaos and big fat brain drain! Trust me I know.

What I continue to learn is if something isn’t challenging us then we are not learning and evolving. Not sure about you but the aspect of staying the same scares the crap out of me. So I have had to remind myself of that quite a few times this week. The move has been one that I know is absolutely something that I have needed to do on so many levels. That doesn’t mean that “fear” doesn’t turn up on occasions and I can send myself into a little tail spin. After all we are humans first and foremost. We can go about being all spiritual and stuff but what does that mean anyways? I would much rather not go into labels and instead simply be real and raw. We tend to shy away time and time again from feelings of pain and uncomfortableness, but these are the ones that stem the most growth.

So for me right now, I know that this is a time of total transition. Yes there is fear around the unknown. At times there is pure joy and others an emotion I can’t even identify with because I have never quite been here before. I know that I wake up to an ocean of pure bliss and the sounds of waves which sing to my soul. I can also sit at a coffee shop and watch the connections of friends meeting up and miss home. I can choose to live in the fear of the unknown or I can embrace every opportunity that this sea change has to offer and rise. It doesn’t mean that I am not going to go through a range of “stuff” at any given time. What it does teach me is to live love, get outside of my head and create from a space of freedom and compassion. Blessed be and so it is.

With a sprinkle of fairy dust and may magic follow your day.

 

HUGE LOVE

 

Sonia

xoxoxo

12. Being present to every moment of our lives is living in our spirituality. True spirituality is in the living of it, not the talking about it.

19029343_839038659579053_3095253800428569887_n

I am not sure who wrote this quote. It is from a woman’s calendar that has been sitting on my desk. It is for women who “do too much”. The irony is that I glance it at from time to time but don’t absorb what is being written. Today I felt compelled to rip off the pages that had already occurred and of course there was a message that I connected to. In just over a short week I will be moving to Queensland and taking a leap of faith. I have packed up my home and am almost ready to go. Today at work I completed an official handover with clients that I have worked with and now I am tying up final loose ends.

I made a conscious decision to stay present and in the moment. Unfortunately or fortunately this hasn’t always been working for me. (insert lesson here) This morning I got myself into quite a tizz. I have expected that there would be some kind of emotional overload going on. After all I am Italian and can be quite dramatic at times. #justsaying#.  I am moving to a place where I have never lived before. Everything I know will be no longer and I am moving away from my family and friends, my support network and all I have known for such a long time. I am excited and so ready! However I have had moments of meltdown. I am not judging it rather I am just allowing that what needs to come up is being presented so it can be cleared.

This move for me has been based on what my heart feels and listening to the sounds of my soul. The sounds have resonated and the feelings have vibrated through every morsel of my being. The feeling of connectedness is one of freedom and truth.  I am being supported in every decision along the way. Life is about learning and perspective of what is presented to us. There have been challenges and that is perfectly OK. It is what I do with them that matters. I can choose to go into fear or I can rise about it and learn from what is being presented. If I am present in that exact moment, nothing else truly matters. My past is just that and has no power or energy unless I choose to give it ammunition. The choice is completely mine.  So a part of going with the flow is going with what is presented, good, bad or indifferent. We easily connect with feelings of joy. When we are presented with pain, anger or whatever we deem to be uncomfortable we try to shun it away. For me the most important lesson of this experience has been to stay present. Nothing else matters except right now. My past is a gift, simple, full stop, the end. The present is all we truly have and simply being in this moment. Blessed be and so it is.

 

With a sprinkle of fairy dust and may magic follow your day.

 

HUGE LOVE

 

Sonia

xoxoxoox