6. Today is a great day to visualize, imagine, create and produce.

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For the last week or so we have seen the words #blacklivesmatter# plastered all over social media and of course they absolutely do. We have seen and heard the injustices that are currently being played out and we are appalled and rightly so. However why is it only now that we feel that this has been occurring? I want to profess that I am not an expert this is simply what it feels like for me and what I know to be true, that creates a stir in my soul.

As Australians did we know that this week is reconciliation week? Reconciliation week is a time for all Australians to learn about our shared histories, cultures and achievements and how each of us can contribute to achieving reconciliation in Australia. The very same week a mining company blew up a 46,000 year old cave. The irony is beyond insulting. Did we plaster this all over social media or did we not even know that it was reconciliation week? I have also read some alarming posts that people in Australia have not grown up with racism? Have we been living under a rock?

Do we know and understand that in our very communities Aboriginal people are still not accessing services that they are entitled to because they have been treated so poorly in the past. Did you know that we are still not providing inclusion in the services that we provide for the owners and true custodians of our land? Do you know if your workplace has a Reconciliation Action Plan which is a formal statement of your organisation commitment to reconciliation?

I have worked in the NDIS space for a few years. Aboriginal people are still not accessing services that they are entitled to. A reform as huge as the NDIS was not inclusive and considerate of Aboriginal culture and language which continues to disadvantage our communities. I attend meetings and continue to shake my head in disbelief that as “white fellas” we continue to make the same FK ups time and time again. So before we proclaim that we are not racist, how as individuals are we contributing to the same? The systematic racism is rife!

We have been waiting to get back to “normal”; I don’t want things to go back to normal. I am glad that the world has been shaken up so that perhaps we have a better chance of understanding what responsibility we all have in this world and how we contribute to racism. This isn’t about shaming or making something right and wrong nor is it about black lives in America or Aboriginal lives in Australia. For me it is about let’s make a stance all the time. Let’s unite at any opportunity we have. Let us be educated about what is going on right under our very noses, in our classrooms, in our workplaces and in our everyday conversations so that justice can be served. Today is a great day to visualize, imagine, create and produce.

#2020#connect2createchange#

With a splash of mermaid magic and let unicorns lead your way.

HUGE LOVE

Sonia xxo

4. Choosing to wade through the mud is often what bears the greatest gifts

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I woke up thinking about my cousin Cathy this morning. She took her own life over 4 years ago. I think of her a lot, but more so in my times of shutdown or when I am feeling somewhat disconnected to myself. Her life continues to offer me hope and inspiration. You see I don’t really believe that Cathy wanted to die (she may have) we can never know for sure. But I truly feel she just wanted the pain to stop.  What saddens me the most about her death is that in the depths of her darkness she didn’t reach out. Did she even know how? I have come to a place of forgiveness about this for myself but it is also what pushes me to create an impact about suicide prevention and awareness.

Loss of connection to self can be debilitating and for a long time I didn’t even know what that meant. Now I do and I know the difference but it doesn’t mean that I am never sad, grumpy, angry or flat. In fact this can be quite the contrary. In the last few weeks I have felt angry and defeated and haven’t necessarily been able to pinpoint it to a particular event or situation. Sure there are some instances and situations that may have triggered that emotion but I also know that it has presented to have a little dance with.

I am very blessed that the people in my life love me for who I am so I don’t have to pretend to be happy if I am not. They usually know as soon as I say hello that something is up. When I was chatting to a friend the other day who had been feeling in a similar way we also acknowledged the gifts that come from the disconnection. We are meant to experience all spectrums of life. It doesn’t mean we have to walk around being a grumpy ass hole but it is also important to be kind to the grumpy asshole that made an appearance. As much as I love unicorns and rainbows sometimes I just want to throw glitter in people’s faces that have pushed my buttons! As much as that would give me a giggle I know that is mostly about bringing it back to me. What part have I played to create this? What do I need to learn or let go of?  Acknowledging and being in those moments is often part of the process for growth.

For now I know that action is important. Sometimes it is the simplest of moments that make a difference. Yesterday I watched a young toddler take pure delight in opening a lollipop and sucking it straight into his mouth. What joy! It is the connections that we weave that create the most magic. It is the conscious conversations and level of responsibility in all that we do that ultimately makes a difference.  When we can appreciate our differences and have a common respect and loyalty for all humanity then ultimately freedom transpires.  Choosing to wade through the mud is often what bears the greatest gifts. Blessed be and so it is.

 

With a sprinkle of fairy dust and may magic follow your day

HUGE LOVE

 

Sonia

xxx

20. “Don’t let anybody walk through your mind with their dirty feet” – Ghandi

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I heard this quote twice yesterday. When I heard it for the second time I really stopped to listen and feel what it meant for me. Earlier that day I had been listening to some radio station. They were talking about forgiveness. I almost changed it but something stopped me. The announcer explained that when we hate someone every day it requires a lot of effort and energy. The act of forgiveness happens once and we are done. Sounds pretty simple and it was definitely something that I needed to be reminded of. I am no angel, far from it. I am a human having a spiritual experience. I don’t love all the time but for most of the time I have an open heart. My blog is about writing with a compassionate heart even on the days when I don’t want to. These are the times when I need it the most.

So after having heard the quote twice and having listened to the story about forgiveness I figured there was certainly something that I needed to look into. There is no surprise that someone from my past surfaced and had been only what they can be. Being compassionate also means that the other party is doing the best that they can and they are in their own process of healing. Look if you had of heard me at the time it was quite the contrary, but a day or two later and I have learnt to not let someone walk through my mind with their dirty feet.

First and foremost we are human beings. I believe in order to evolve that we have to experience all the extremities of emotions, irrespective of whether they feed good or bad. Sometimes or not it helps to analyse the crap out of a misdoing and we simply do our head in. On a conscious level we are aware that the thoughts we are allowing to consume us are only generating a negative impact on our bodies and lives.

Our souls remind us that what we are going through is for the greater good or is redirecting us to a bigger and better place. However our minds and our bodies can tell us otherwise. We carry anger, distaste and attempt to rationalise the injustice that has occurred. Unfortunately or not our bodies can take a little more time to catch up to what we truly know. Respecting and honouring the process is paramount to our evolvement. I am all for love in fact I thrive in an atmosphere of love. It is all good and well to send love and light but sometimes let’s just own it and call it for what it is. I know that anger and resentment isn’t worth hanging onto to but I also know that I am human and feeling all of what life has to offer is part of my growth and aligning me to exactly where I am meant to be  “Don’t let anybody walk through your mind with their dirty feet”– Ghandi. Blessed be and so it is. So it is done.

With a sprinkle of fairy dust and may magic follow your day.

 

HUGE LOVE

 

Sonia

xoo

8. When you judge others, you do not define them, you define yourself.

11891009_741451075966461_8994629356509500673_n   Last night my family and I celebrated our cousin Cathy who took her own life over 12 months ago. It was a bitter sweet evening that saw over 100 people attend a fundraising event to support suicide awareness. Suicide prevention and awareness is something that I am very passionate about. It is not only because of my cousin, nonno and the countless others that have taken their lives, but also because I know all too well about my own struggle with suicidal ideation in the past. I was afraid of judgement and there was so much shame and stigma attached. The harsh reality is that judgement has existed in one way or another. For me I am proud of this part of my journey it has truly allowed me to know and understand life to a level that I never knew. I have heard so many comments about suicide and as the affirmation presents it is not about judgment on any part. Nobody will ever know what it feels to live in another person’s mind or body and therefore we do not have the right to judge. Yes the effects are devastating but for me personally what I find more excruciating is that another human has had to suffer so much that they feel that this is the only way to end their pain. I can understand this feeling as I know how very close I came to it. The thought of dying felt so much more peaceful than living.  So although it may be easy to “judge” another because they have left their family and friends with so much heartbreak and sadness, it is also important to remember that by judgement we are only defining who we are. To an extent there is free will in suicide but there is also a mind that is distorted beyond a realm of comprehension. I could write about this topic endlessly, there is so much to say and so much to do. The statistics are ridiculously high and in a world where we live with so much technological connection our connectedness to humanity and each other seems to be diminishing. There is so much judgement that is associated around the topic of suicide and this is something that needs to change. The stigma needs to be removed and the topic of how we feel should be open for discussion. Why is it that we find it so easy to celebrate and discuss our perceived successes yet there is difficulty to find strength in our vulnerability? We certainly can’t change about what could have been and this is possibly one of the toughest lessons to endure. Judgement for self creeps in but has no avail. Our past can only teach us the beauty of lessons that take us into the present moment of life and all that it has to offer.  As much as the lessons are painful and filled with so many unanswered questions what we do know is that we can create the path and peace if we choose. We can connect to create change. When you judge others, you do not define them, you define yourself. Namaste. With a sprinkle of fairy dust and may magic follow your day, HUGE LOVE Sonia xoxoxoxo

77. As I forgive myself, it becomes easier to forgive others.

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Forgiveness is such an act of freedom. Too often we perceive forgiveness as a sign of weakness especially when somebody has caused us an injustice of some kind.  When I write about my blog for today there are a few things that come up for me. One of them is the men that have played such significant parts in my life.  What I have discovered is that just because you are “over” a situation it doesn’t mean that you don’t still have things that you may or may not need to learn from. I am not one to get into nitty gritty details about my life and talk about what others may or may not have done. It is not my style. What I do know is that some of the actions that have been displayed by men in my life have been shitty and not very nice. Yes I take personal responsibility for this because I allowed it to continue. F*&K I spent almost 20 years of crappy relationships but I did not know any better or different. Now I do and I can practise forgiveness.

So when I was confronted by a man recently with behaviour that was untoward, I wanted to tell him what a total tosser he was. I was really pissed at the universe because I just couldn’t understand why this was being presented to me. What did I have to learn? To top it all I also learnt that a friend lied about a situation. By this stage of the week I wanted to tell the world where to go. In the midst of it all, there were bit fat egos circling my days.  I was attempting to be at peace with where I was at but I am sure if you listened closely you would have heard profanities mutterings coming from my area.

So what this is teaching me is that there is so many times in my life where people have treated in ways that I have not liked or deserved. The violin strings could come out right about now but instead I can reflect and acknowledge the times that I have not treated myself with dignity and respect. The amount of times that I allowed situations to occur again and again and now it was being presented to me in full force.

What is different this time is I am not the same person I may have been all that time ago. This time I have self-worth and respect but what I am able to acknowledge is the pain and hurt that was caused. There is nothing cool about emotional abuse, betrayal and coming from ego to make it better for the other person.  When we sustain these kinds of relationships in our lives it is because our worthiness does not exist and the only way we know is to self-destruct.

The lessons of love are ones that are stemmed from forgiveness. Ultimately if we cannot forgive ourselves for our perception of where we have not lived our truth or have been authentic then we are in the mode of self-destruct. This energy and vibration put us in a place of ego and we do not feel and live the true essence of who we are. To the energy vampires that ultimately lead me to a place of trust, compassion and forgiveness, THANK YOU but for the sake of humanity take personal responsibility and deal with your crap! To my inner self I forgive you for not having enough respect and self-love to honour the scared path that I am walking at this time. I know that if I do not forgive then I can never really fully love.  As I forgive myself, it becomes easier to forgive others. Blessed be and so it is. So it is done. Namaste.

With a sprinkle of fairy dust and may magic follow your day.

HUGE LOVE

Sonia

xoxoxox